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CONTEXT: In two previous articles we explained methods for how to create and implement a life plan, and how to create and implement a team development plan. This article focuses on how to identify, prioritize, and overcome personal and team behavior flaws.
WHAT IS IT THAT WILL MORE LIKELY IMPEDE YOU from getting where you want to go in your career? Some think it might be a lack of intelligence, which causes people to focus virtually all of their development on learning about the next big innovative breakthrough – such as artificial intelligence and deep learning. But, as it turns out, intelligence seems to be overrated in terms of your business success, especially the higher you go in an organization. Forbes magazine reported research findings carried out by Carnegie Mellon Institute of Technology concluding that 85% of your business success is due to skills in ‘human engineering,’ your personality and your ability to communicate, negotiate, and to lead. Shockingly, only 15% of your business success is due to intelligence.” So, it’s the flawed interpersonal skills and the resulting behaviors that may have the most significant impact on your effectiveness.
ASSUMPTION: So, assuming you desire to overcome your most significant barrier to your success in business you should consider to focus on your behavior flaws and your interpersonal skills. As Peter Drucker once said, “We spend a lot of time teaching leaders what to do. We don’t spend enough time teaching leaders what to stop.”
PERSONAL CHALLENGE: How to identify, prioritize, and take decisive action that helps you stop engaging in the behavior flaws that prevent you from realizing the future you desire.
SUGGESTED APPROACH TO OVERCOME THE PERSONAL CHALLENGE: The foundation for this approach is outlined in a book written by Marshall Goldsmith, a highly regarded executive coach.
-STEP 1 – Read through What Got You Here Won’t Get You There … How Successful People Become Even More Successful.
- STEP 2 – Complete a 20 behavior flaws self-assessment. Goldsmith outlines 20-behavior flaws that represent, from his extensive experience as an executive-coach, those most frequently performed in business by one person against another. Here is an example of one of the behavior flaws outlined in Goldsmith’s book (refer to chapter 5 – The Twenty Habits). Winning too much: The need to win at all costs and in all situations - when it matters, when it doesn't, and when it's totally beside the point. There's a fine line between competitive and being over-competitive - and successful people cross that line with alarming frequency. I require the Executive MBA’s, MBA’s and my executive clients to assess themselves on each of the 20-behavior flaws using the following three ratings: (1) virtually never do it; (2) sometimes do it; (3) frequently do it – especially, in stressful situations. After they assess themselves vs. all 20 behavior flaws, I ask them to identify the one behavior flaw they believe hurts them the most.
- STEP 3: Receive feedback from others. Ask three people from among those you highly respect to complete an assessment of your 20 behavior-flaws and to identify the behavior flaw they think hurts you the most. It is critical to select people that will tell you the truth. No one will benefit if they are not willing to provide you with an authentic and straight-forward assessment of your behavior flaws.
- STEP 4: Read through the three peer assessments and your personal assessment. Use all 4 of the assessments as inputs to help you identify the one behavior flaw that you will focus on to improve your effectiveness.
- STEP 5: Ask one of your peers to be an Accountability Partner for you. An Accountability Partner is someone that you will meet with on a regular basis (once a week, once every other week – you chose). Their role is to help you hold yourself accountable to take the actions you identify that will help you reduce the use of the behavior flaw you selected.
- STEP 6: Prepare to receive Feed-forward suggestions. Feed-forward suggestions are actions that you could take in the future to help you reduce the use of your selected behavior flaw. It is forward-focused. Here is the pre-work that you need to complete prior to receiving Feed-forward suggestions from others … identify:
1. The behavior that I choose to change is ….
2. What triggers me to activate this behavior is ….
3. The reason I think I engage in this behavior is because ….
4. If I don’t improve on this behavior this is what could happen …. and this is why that’s so important for me to avoid ….
- STEP 7: Select 5 people to meet with to receive Feed-forward suggestions. Actually, it is very helpful to select people you don’t even know to provide you with suggestions. Many executives travel extensively – mostly by themselves. Some executives that I’ve advised are, surprisingly, relatively private people and it was not a habit of theirs to engage in conversations with their fellow passengers. But, I helped them realize they could receive some excellent Feed-forward suggestions from the person seated next to them on a flight.
- STEP 8: Complete Feed-forward sessions. Referring to STEP 6: Review your responses to items 1 – 4. Then ask those providing the Feed-forward suggestions to provide you with 3 suggested actions you could take to reduce the use of the behavior flaw you selected. Look them in the eyes when they are talking to you. Then write down their suggestions. If you need to ask questions, they should only be clarification questions. Once you receive their suggestions and you clearly understand what they told you, look them in eyes and tell them thank you. Think about it – once you meet with 5 people you know and possibly with 3 people you don’t know you will end up with 24 suggestions from some very bright people on how you can reduce the use of your most significant behavior flaw. Unintended consequence: Actually, you might have made such an impact on those providing you suggestions that they might follow through with facing their behavior flaws – we all have them. I’ve known this to happen and it is a way to make an impact on someone’s life.
Note – reference writing down suggestions: I’ve met with hundreds of entrepreneurs that requested suggestions
on how they could improve. What I’ve learned is people that ask for help fall into 1 of 2 groups. Group 1 – they are sincerely interested in receiving help and they write down the suggestions offered – whether they like the suggestion or not. A person that immediately comes to mind is Lyden Foust. Lyden, a former student at Xavier University that launched Campus Solutions, LLC on campus (https://www.gocampussolutions.com/) sought advice from many different people and he always wrote down their suggestions. He also told them what he liked about their suggestions. Group 2 are people who just want attention and have no intention of taking-action. I can be pretty blunt at times – sometimes to a fault. If I take the time to meet with someone that asked for my help and they do not write down what I suggesting I call them out on it. I tell them that it is obvious to me that what I’m suggesting is of no value to them because they are not writing it down. I then tell them that the next person they meet with to receive help they should consider taking notes. I then excuse myself and wish them well. The reason I tell this story is that you need to make sure you write down the Feed-forward suggestions that you receive. If you don’t then you send a very clear message that you are really not interested in what they have to offer.
- STEP 9: Reflect on the Feed-forward suggestions received. You need to specifically identify the actions you will take to begin reducing the use of your selected behavior flaw. Once you’ve identified your actions you will review them with your Accountability Partner.
- STEP 10: Prepare for and then meet with your Accountability Partner. Prior to your meeting with your Accountability Partner you need to complete the following prework:
1. The behavior that I choose to change is ….
2. What triggers me to activate this behavior is ….
3. The reason I think I engage in this behavior is because ….
4. If I don’t improve on this behavior this is what could happen …. and this is why that’s so important for me to prevent it from happening ….
5. So, in the future, when this happens … instead of doing this … I will do this …
6. This won’t be easy for me – the most significant challenge I’ll have is ….
7. This is what I will do to overcome that challenge …
8. And when I overcome this behavior others will treat me differently … here’s how …
Note: For steps 5 – 8, I applied what I learned in The Coaching Habit
- STEP 11: Meet with your Accountability Partner. Referring to STEP 9 review items 1 – 8. Afterwards, ask them for their observations – write them down. Questions about their observations should be focused on understanding, not on refuting. At the end of the meeting ask the Accountability Partner if there is anything you may do for them. Then look them in the eyes and say thank you. Make sure to schedule your next meeting with them so you can review your progress.
Applying this method (STEPS 1 – 11) might seem like a lot of work – well, it is a lot of work and it requires you to make a conscious choice to invest your time to realize an expected return. But, if you made the investment in time to develop a life plan and to develop a team improvement plan, you will be motivated to make this investment. Why? Because you know that if you don’t improve on this behavior flaw it will prevent you from making progress on your individual life plan and your team’s improvement plan.
Team Learning Groups. An enhancement to the method described above would be to apply a concept called Learning Groups. I discovered this concept from the book, Primal Leadership. High-performing Teams develop a culture that is grounded in extreme levels of trust and accountability. Having extreme levels of trust fosters an environment where team members openly exchange frank feedback to one another on how they can improve in both their personal and professional life.
If you want to learn more about how these and other methods can be tailored to help you and your team focus on creating new realities, contact us at Incline Insights, LLC. Tailored. Focused. Solutions.
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